Ioana P.

What's been stirring in Ioana...

Flesh vs. Spirit:

We've heard the sermons, and read the scriptures about fighting our flesh and feeding our spirit…but goodness how difficult it is to truly live and fight for that.  From the moment I wake up to the minute I fall asleep I find myself in a constant battle between my selfish, guilty, bodily pleasures, and the pure and perfect desires of the spirit. There is this superficial gratification that I get when I feed my flesh.  A manipulation, perhaps by Satan, that makes me believe that choosing my flesh is normal, right, and perfectly satisfying. It's later when I feel the loving conviction of the Father reminding me of His truths and promises.  It's later when I remember that though it is SO much easier to listen to my flesh, my life is so much more fulfilling if I listen to the spirit. Listening to my flesh grants me temporary satisfaction and temporary happiness. Listening to the spirit grants me permanent satisfaction and permanent joy. And yes, it is a grueling battle, and yes it never ends, and yes it breaks your heart at times but during each individual battle you have a team mate that is fighting alongside you, encouraging and empowering you with the strength you need to make the choice that makes it in the end, the most worth it.

 

Wasting Time:

We've heard the same talk from Christians and non-believers, Hallmark Cards and commercials, magazines and teachers, all urging us to seize the day and live for the present in order to not waste our time about what could or will be.  Lately, I've found myself daily asking the same questions:  have I fulfilled my purpose for today? Have I genuinely asked the Lord to have his way with me today? Have I asked Him to guide my feet, hands, lips, and mind? And the honest answer to those questions lately, is no. No I haven't.  For weeks I have woken up and selfishly thought about what I wanted or needed to do that day. I spent days sitting around for constant hours dreaming about the future and hating the present state of my life.  I've wasted and wasted and wasted, beautiful, precious, sweet time. I read a part of the book Blue Like Jazz a few months ago where the author, Donald Miller, said "I believe that the greatest trick of the devil is not to get into some sort of evil but rather have us wasting time."  And really, the only thing you can do to get out of such a position is beg. Beg, beg, and beg for the Lord to change your heart and mind. Beg for your thoughts to be his thoughts. And your footsteps to be his footsteps. Your lips, his lips. And your hands, his hands. What else can you do? I am alive to serve a great purpose, a purpose that does not rest on glorifying me and my needs, but rather by glorifying God and fulfilling his will for my life. I want to serve this purpose. I don't want to serve a "Carpe Diem" slapped on a coffee mug purpose. I don't want to serve a cheesy Hallmark "live for the present" Card purpose. I want to serve the purpose that I was created to serve! I want to look back on my earthly life when I am in Heaven, and say: Mission Accomplished.